two birds with one stone

Okay, so I have this weird relationship with "stuff." I don't like when things hang around that aren't being used and just add to the clutter. So I LOVE to organize things and get rid of our unused junk. (I've been known to organize so well that I actually 'hide' things from myself)

But I also HATE wasting things, which is the complete opposite, and so I tend to hang on to stuff that might have another use and end up with a stash of 'possibility.' Which goes against all my organizing in the first place....           ....this is part of my craziness! :-)

Well, I was SO excited when I was able to do a couple DIY projects recently and satisfy a bit of both of my urges!  I wanted to frame a couple of prints that I've had laying around, so before hitting the stores to frame them I decided to check out what we had laying around. And I hit the jackpot!!! 

"Surrender Your Fear"

Kelly Rae Roberts

I liked the style of an older frame that fit Kelly Rae Robert's print, but the color was outdated and ugly. So I just decided to paint it! It took a little while, and a couple of layers of red to get the color just like I wanted it, but in the end I really like the result. And I thought, "what the heck," I'll just paint over it again if I don't like it.

"The Chief Became a Volcano"

Jesse Reno

I had this larger print of Jesse Reno's and I found a great modern metal frame with a great steel blue tone. The print that we had in it had weathered and rippled and needed to be thrown away. The framed print had been given to us at our wedding 13 years ago, so it had its day! All I had to do was order a custom mat (like $20) and then reframe it myself. It's perfect!

I managed to reduce my 'stuff' laying around and not waste anything - YAY!!

What Might Have Been Lost

I finally took a little time and framed out one of my completed pieces from my Jesse Reno workshop. I added a nice 1.5 inch birch edge to the entire board and decided to leave it unpainted. I like how it adds to the rawness of the painting. 

I decided to hang it up directly over my desk as a reminder to myself as I paint. When I worked on this painting earlier this summer in Portland, I had a huge breakthrough. An emotional breakthrough, a moment where I truly felt like I was at the right place at the right moment in my life. It was powerful, and this painting is that reminder of that experience. I felt like I was letting go and allowing myself to be more free with my art and it was giving back to me in ways I can't even explain.

"What Might Have Been Lost"

24 x 24 mixed media on wood

acrylic, oil pastel, pencil

 Through Jesse's prompts and lessons during that workshop I let a lot out in this painting. Jesse likes to record some of his thoughts and meaning of his paintings as he's working on them. I decided to share mine with you as well. I'd like for you to interpret it for yourself, but for me it was:

honest, indecisive

lost and broken

feeling chained to old choices

seeking wisdom, seeing clearer with her third eye

music and tears

two bodies become one

they are all connected

the moon will rise again

For those of you who are Bon Iver fans, you might notice the references to a couple of their songs. The song, "re: Stacks" instigated my epiphany and the onslaught of tears. But a phrase from another one of their songs, "what might have been lost," felt like it was the perfect name for this painting.  

Art has the wonderful ability to challenge you, inspire you, and share your innermost thoughts.  This painting speaks to me about a lot of things, and as I continue to persevere in discovering myself as an artist, I will look up and be reminded to...... let go.

Isn't it just like a woman to change her mind?

I had set this painting to the side last week, feeling like it was close to being done.  I was SO excited when I got a couple of new shades of paint to try, and I loved this new shade of brown (Van Dyke Brown) which I ended up adding to a majority of this painting. It has a nice transparent quality to it, so some of my reds and greens looked really neat underneath it. This thing had gone through about 10 different layers by this point and it was feeling done in a certain way, but something just kept nagging at me about it.

I kept taking it out on a daily basis, looking at it from one angle, then another, then turning it upside-down....and I'd just end up putting it away again. 

What did I like about it? What was working? What wasn't?

It boiled down to the fact that I liked a lot of the colors, but the imagery just didn't feel like it was ME. And that has been my biggest struggle lately, pinpointing the ME that I need to infuse into my paintings.

Sure, it might sound easy...just be yourself.

But that's not so easy, at least not yet...

So, I decided to listen to my intuition and make a bold move...

I turned it upside down and attacked it again. This was a little scary as it felt like I was ruining something that was "almost done."

But, right away I felt like I'd moved it in the right direction. I really liked the lotus flower and as it progresses further, mountains seem to be emerging....loving it! And already it feels more ME.

It's still got a ways to go, but I'm much happier with the direction it's headed.

I'm SO glad I changed my mind!

 

a bloom among the chaos

(Can you see bits of the bike in the egret's shape - a layer I  posted in the last blog?)

I've been working on several larger paintings as I've been progressing through Flora Bowley's Bloom Tue e-course. I've been experiencing a variety of emotions as I move through different stages in these paintings. Excitement....extreme frustration and everything in between. It's a bit of an emotional roller coaster ride! I like some of the grounds that I've built up, but then don't feel overly connected to some of the imagery that I've added. So I've gone back and reworked areas, simplified in others, and although I think they are moving in the right direction these still feel long from finished. However, I did have one lone painting that has emerged and feels, "done." I can't tell you how good it feels to have at least one painting feel like its found its way out of me in the last 8 weeks.

This one measures 11 3/4" by 24" on wood and I haven't titled it yet. I'm really pleased with the composition and colors (I just got this Sap Green and I LOVE it!) and interesting grounds  that it reveals. 

Here are a couple close-ups of some of the areas.

I'll continue to work my way through the others, and I'm sure SOMETHING will emerge!

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;

What is essential is invisible to the eye."

-The Little Prince